Monday, September 15, 2008
BABY BLUES
Well as everybody who reads my blog probably know that Travis and I had a hard time getting pregnant with Navi and we had to do IVF. We spent about 31/2 year trying to figure out what the probably was and how to fix it, but in the end we got pregnant the first time with Navi ( I don't think I could have withstood much longer) So our first years as a newly married couple were the HARDEST of my life. I really never thought we would make it through it. I look back and I think how absent I was in life because of it. I really should have just enjoyed life and all it had to offer at the time. Well so it's been 5 years since those trials started and I kinda feel like now that we have been trying to have another baby and things aren't going as I have planned. (I for some reason thought that now that we know what we have to do it would just happen.) And it would happen on the first try like Navi. But it hasn't and I find myself thinking all day about it and thinking how I might never get to hold a newborn again and all those special moments that come with a new baby. I know that 5 years ago i said that I just want one baby that all I need to make me happy. But of course now I find myself saying Navi has to have a sister please please just give Navi a sister. So this is the Question: WHEN IS IT EVER GOOD ENOUGH???
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3 comments:
Stacey, I hate that you have to go through this huge trial. I know that I cant totaly relate to how you feel, but I know how it feels to hate your trial so much and wish so badly it was different. The only thing that has helped me, is to see the beauty in other things,once I started really looking for the good I could see a little clearer.Then I try to keeep busy as heck. I believe our trials are for a reason, they are not meaningless.Hevenly Father knows your heart.Their is nothing sweeter than a mother wanting her babies!Remember your not forgotten, look how much Hevenly Father loves you, he gave you the sweetest blessing he could,Navi!you are a beautiful mother, you will know what to do, its hard to be patient when you and Travis make such lovable adorable little Navis. Hang in there, Im one of your cheerleaders!!!
If you REALLY feel that you need another baby in your family, I'm sure that the Lord will help you to get one. Maybe it won't be in the way that you thought it will be. He will not leave you feeling empty where another child should be. That doesn't mean that you will get pregnant right away or even at all. I just know that blessings come in all sorts of packages. Hang in there Stacey. You are such a deserving mother and I LOVE YOU!
Babies are completely different than money or clothes. Never feel greedy for want more children. #1 having pregnant is part of your divine purpose and I truly believe that. #2 Thank you for having the faith to keep trying and for not giving up.
You make me appreciate what I have so much more and I only wish I could do more for you.
Ps. Awesome job on the blog!!!!
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